One Liner Best Humor Fathers Day Jokes

On this Father’s Day use these Humor Fathers Day Jokes and make the occasion memorable by sending & sharing it with your dad or you may use these quotes on presents or Fathers Day Funny Cards. A touch of humor goes a long way in making relationships work and when that relationship is a father-child one, laughter can be a great stress booster.

For this purpose we’ve compiled the list of short clean jokes and quotes for daddy, One Liner Fathers Day Funny Jokes or Status for Kids or Children, Famous Happy Fathers Day Funny Quotes and Sayings From Wife to Husband, Rude & Hilarious Cute Fathers Day Quotes and Sayings for Funny Fathers Day Greetings, Short Dad Jokes to Make her laugh, Cute Comedy Quotations for Dad, Brother, Grandfather & Loving Uncle etc. Happy Fathers Day

Hilarious Fathers Day Funny Quotes And Sayings

Funny Fathers Day Jokes

 

1) You’ll be a great father one day accidentally.

 

2) Father is the God who stays back at home, not at heaven.

 

3) It is a wise child that knows his own father. ~ Homer Simpson

 

4) Guns don’t kill people, DAD’s with pretty daughters kill people.

 

5) Me and my dad used to play tag. He’d drive. ~ Rodney Dangerfield

 

6) My dream for Father’s Day is not to be a father for that day. ~ Anonymous

 

7) You spent less time for planning to be a father than I’ve spent planning your Father’s Day.

 

8) My daughter got me a “World’s Best Dad” mug. So we know she’s sarcastic. ~  Bob Odenkirk

 

9) Dad, you taught me all those instructional things that can be easily found on YouTube videos.

 

10) The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents, the second half by our children. ~ Clarence Darrow

 

11) Father, whom I murdered every night but one, That one, when your death murdered me. ~ Howard Moss

 

12) A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~ Enid Bagnold

 

13) I talk and talk and talk, and I haven’t taught people in 50 years what my father taught by example in one week. ~ Mario Cuomo

 

14) Having children is like living in a frat house – nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up. ~ Ray Romano

 

15) Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis. ~  Jack Handey

 

Check this– Inspirational Single Dad Quotes

 

Funny Dad Quotes | One Liner Best Fathers Day Jokes

Funny Dad Quotes

Funny Dad Quotes

 

16) Dad, can you put the cat out? I didn’t know it was on fire.

 

17) “I’ll call you later!” “Please don’t do that. I’ve always asked you to call me Dad!”

 

18) Dad!“Are you alright dad?”’“Actually, technically, I’m half left and half right.”

 

19) When somebody asks my dad how he feels, he always replies, „With my hands.“

 

20) What is the father’s day for a little child? It’s just like another Mother’s day to him, the only difference, however, is that you don’t need to spend so much.

 

21) Once a son asked for another glass full of water to his father, the father said that he already has given 10 glasses of water. The son replied that “Yes, but the bedroom is still on fire!”

 

22) My father is so old that when he was in school, history was called current affairs.

 

23) “You can tell what was the best year of your father’s life because they seem to freeze that clothing style and ride it out.”

 

24) “Even though I’m proud my dad invented the rear-view mirror, we’re not as close as we appear.”

 

25) “Father’s Day is important because, besides being the day on which we honor Dad, it’s the one day of the year that Brookstone does any business.”

 

26) When I was a kid, I said to my father one afternoon, Daddy, will you take me to the zoo? He answered, If the zoo wants you, let them come and get you. -Jerry Lewis

 

27) Fathers Day, when you get that lethal combination of alcohol and new power tools. -David Letterman

 

28) The place of the father in the modern suburban family is a very small one, particularly if he plays golf. -Bertrand Russe

 

29) I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof. -Rodney Dangerfield

 

30) Happy Fathers Day, Dad! I wouldn’t trade you for anything. Of course, nobody’s offered me anything. -Melanie White

 

Also, Visit–  Dad Sayings From Son